It never ceases to amaze me how stupid the general male population is when it comes to women. Even in my younger and more naive days, I was never such an imbecile. Let me give you an example…
On my last birthday, I went out for some drinks with friends. I had a couple of people lined up to drive me home, but one of the women who worked there insisted on being my designated driver. So of course I granted her request and sent all my friends home. Near the end of the night before we left, there was a guy orbiting her. Apparently, he was insisting that she loved him and they were going to spend the night together. As she drove me home, this guy followed her all the way to my house. I was absolutely blown away that any guy would have the audacity to follow a woman like this. My designated driver told me that this was a somewhat regular occurrence in her life. After she dropped me off, the orbiter then followed her all the way across the city back to her house. He apparently came back the next day and sat outside her house in his car. She eventually called the police on him.
There’s enough media exposure about the creepy behaviours of men to inform them that this is not attractive behaviour, but many men still do it. The same goes with sending dick pics through online dating sites.
So why was this bar worker so interested in spending time with me as opposed to the stalker guy? Well, let’s boil it all down. These are all things that make women attracted to a man:
Women absolutely love confident men. If you tell her your sob stories about how mean your ex-girlfriend was to you, you’re not going to win her over. Pity does NOT equal attraction.
To show confidence, you need to approach her without intimidation, but with the simple goal of communicating something interesting. Confident people can strike up conversations with strangers, women included. Confident men also have no problem taking the lead. Ever go out to eat with a woman? They’re terrible decision makers. They tend to go with whatever their emotions are telling them, but their emotions don’t fluctuate quickly enough to make efficient decisions on what to eat from a restaurant menu. If she’s having trouble, kindly get some options from her and pick something for her. YES, CHOOSE WHAT SHE’S EATING. You’re doing the both of you a favour by not wasting time and relieving her of decision making. This is just one example of taking the lead.
Here’s another one… When setting up dates, don’t ask her what she wants to do. You’ll end up going back and forth forever trying to figure out an activity. Think of something to do and take her. If she comes up with an idea for something to do, she’ll let you know. Take her suggestion when she has one.
Positive Attitude: This goes hand-in-hand with confidence. If you view most things in a positive light, you’re going to be enjoyable to be around, and people will gravitate toward you. Ever be around someone who’s always whining or complaining about something? It’s not enjoyable, and it won’t put YOU in a good mood. Personalities are infectious. If you want the other person to be positive toward you, then you must be positive yourself. This doesn’t just go for your interactions with women, it goes for your interactions with EVERYBODY.
Enthusiasm: ALWAYS be just a bit more enthusiastic than her about things. Make her feel like you’re confident and passionate about things.
Kinesthetics: Don’t be afraid to touch her! No, I don’t mean grab her breasts you fucking pig. Acceptable touch is patting her on the shoulder, picking things out of her hair, batting her dangly earrings, putting your hand in the middle of her back to lead her through a doorway, and pretty much anything that isn’t sexual. Do things that you wouldn’t really have a problem doing to a male friend. Escalation to a sexual level (hand holding, kissing) comes after she’s attracted to you.
Humour/Flirting: You need to be playful in order to gain her interest. Treat her like your bratty sister. Throw small paper balls at her. Pinch her cheek and tell her how cute she is in baby talk. Also, don’t forget to pick on yourself a bit. Making jokes about yourself is not only humorous, it’s also extremely confident.
All of this stuff takes practice if you’re not used to it. You NEED to put yourself outside your comfort zone in order to get good at it.
Now, let’s focus on the things you SHOULDN’T do…
First of all, I need to emphasize that men and women are attracted to very different things. Men are primarily attracted to the physical aspects of a woman. Women are primarily attracted to things that cause them emotional fluctuation. Sometimes a man’s looks can trigger it, but more often than not, it will be the man’s personality that will cause her emotions to fluctuate. Thankfully you can train your personality to become more attractive. Women who are born with the “ugly” gene have to work hard to attract men.
So all the things you find attractive about women (their nude sexy parts and outright honesty about engaging in sexual behaviour) are NOT going to have the same effect when you use it on them. Showing them your peener and asking them to fuck is going to get you slapped with a sexual harassment charge.
Here’s some more stuff:
Buying Her Too Much Shit: Flowers, meals, alcohol, candy, jewellery, lingerie, paying their bills, buying things they see in a store, etc, etc, etc. They don’t need all that shit. Buying them all this crap does NOT create attraction. It causes spoilage. What happens when you give a child everything they want? The child starts EXPECTING to get everything they ask for. When that happens, there’s no more excitement when you give them something. Instead, you become a genie who is only called upon when something is needed. The same goes for women. She should be calling upon you because you bring her genuine pleasure with your PERSONALITY.
Worshipping Her: She is not a goddess. She does not hold the key to your heart. She is not the reason for you to live. You should be building your foundation of happiness upon your own interests, goals, and desires. If you build your foundation of happiness upon a woman, your entire life is going to come crashing down if she removes herself from your life. You DO NOT want that. Quit putting her on a pedestal. She’s not a beautiful, precious, breakable gem. She’s only a female human. Treat her as such.
Pestering Her: Bombarding her with text messages and voice mails will piss her off. Repeatedly asking her out is going to annoy her. If she said NO, she means it. If she changes her mind, she’ll let you know. Desperation is NOT an attractive quality to possess.
Also, when you ask her what’s wrong and she says “nothing”, you know damn well there’s something wrong. Pestering her to tell you what’s wrong is just going to piss her off. Leaving her alone until she’s ready to tell you will have better results. Of course you’re wondering what the hell is going on in that brain of hers, but annoying her when she’s in a negative state of emotion is just going to keep her there. Women don’t stay in their high levels of emotion for long. Just wait it out until she levels out.
Boring Sex: She isn’t enjoying sex when you primarily focus on getting yourself off. She is not going to simply enjoy the fact that your dick is inside her. For men, sex is the act of repeated penetration until ejaculation. For women, sex is the build up, the anticipation, the flirting, the kissing, the removal of clothing, the atmosphere, the foreplay, the penetration, the orgasm, and the cuddling afterwards. In other words, the man enjoys the highlight while a woman enjoys the entire movie. If you want her to be sexually satisfied (resulting in more sex for you), you need to give her the full adventure and story. Another thing you need to remember is women don’t want the same story every time. They want things to be different sometimes. They want different positions, different locations, different methods of approaching orgasm, fast, slow, hard, soft, and sometimes all of the above. But sometimes they like to hear the same story twice because you almost NEVER do that.
Too Much Romance: A relationship is much like a meal. You have to have substance in order for it to be enjoyable. Romantic gestures are only a spice to make your relationship more pleasing. Women don’t like their relationship to be a plate full of salt and pepper. Keep the romance spontaneous, but infrequent.
These are the basic guidelines to attract a woman and KEEP them attracted. There are lot of little things you can do to make everything more effective, but these are the major factors that will make her decide if she’s into you or not.
So here’s the end tale of the designated driver and the orbiter…. The orbiter who stalked my female friend displayed a huge amount of desperation. Unlike him, I naturally and subconsciously abide by everything I’ve listed above and she naturally gravitates toward me. When you can do all this stuff without even trying, getting dates becomes extremely easy. You end up having women fall into your lap without even trying.
With regards to this particular woman, I’ve placed her on the backburner because she currently has a boyfriend. In order to seduce her, I need to demonstrate a higher value than her boyfriend (which I’ve been consistently working at). She’s already shared some of her issues with him, one being the fact that he’s too terrified of offending her in the bedroom. Again, women want adventure in the bedroom as well as emotional fluctuation. You cannot be afraid of offending her when trying to please her sexually. If you happen to spank her ass too hard, she’ll get over it. If anything, she probably secretly enjoyed it because she didn’t expect it.
Men, if you decide to achieve the women of your dreams, you need to fix yourself up. You need to become more interesting and less desperate. Work at it. Become better. Become more attractive. Women want real men, not feminized knock-offs masquerading as men. Embrace your masculinity, enhance your best qualities, and surround them with other attractive personality traits. You WILL get results.